A New Ohana

From the moment Tess Tinker and her husband, Don, set foot in Hawaii on their 1986 vacation and saw the palm trees swaying gently in the breeze, they knew someday they would come back to stay.

Tess Tinker finds personal growth in Hawaii

It was love at first sight. From the moment Tess Tinker and her husband, Don, set foot in Hawaii on their 1986 vacation and saw the palm trees swaying gently in the breeze, they knew someday they would come back to stay. They were so sure, they bought land in Hilo. The next year, on the same day Don retired from his job, the Oklahoma natives boarded a plane for Hilo. They have lived there ever since.

Despite the natural beauty and easygoing lifestyle, a lot of folks who retire to Hawaii end up homesick for their family and friends on the mainland. The same thing might have happened to Tess if she hadn’t joined a club—a hula club for senior women. “There are two kinds of hula dancing,” she says. “One is done to the beat of chanting, the other to music.” It was the latter that drew Tess in, and it was the sisterhood that made her stay.

“We start each class with a circle, where we celebrate birthdays or share information about anyone who might be having a bad time,” says Tess. The women aren’t all from the same generation (they range in age from 51 to 87), but their love for dance—and for each other—has kept them close. They look out for one another. “Ohana is the Hawaiian word for extended family,” Tess says. “And this is mine.”

The group means so much to her that she is now an instructor. Still, Tess does occasionally miss the mainland. “It seems pretty far away sometimes,” she admits. “We make trips to Oklahoma a couple times a year.” In the end, though, Tess is always happy to come back to Hawaii, because for her, home is where the ohana is.

Tess’s Tips

1. Find a way to make your dream happen.
Don and I had to live in Hawaii, so we did what we needed to do it.

2. Let your friends sustain you.
My ohana will always be there for me, and I’ll always be there for them!

3. Follow your interests.
I’ve been doing hula for 19 years, and I still find it as beautiful as when I discovered it.

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