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The Joy of Wasting Time

How to enjoy time with your family.

Family time
Credit: Getty Images/iStockphoto

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes?” (Matthew 6:25, NIV) 

One thing I’m frequently guilty of is trying to wring every drop of joy from the time spent with those I love. This was never truer than when our son was in the military. My manic need to never-waste-a-second reached epic proportions just before deployments or training missions. 

I found out later that in order to stop the insanity, my family actually began conspiring with each other to put off telling me about upcoming time apart. Finally it was our military son who sat me down and told me how he felt. 

Not only had I been pressuring myself regarding precious family time, but I had been adding unwanted—and unneeded—pressure to his life as well. His heartfelt plea finally got through to me. “Mom, let’s just hang out and enjoy each other without having to do something to make a memory.”

I promised I would go along with that idea, then promptly blew it by asking what he wanted me to fix for supper that night. We both laughed at my boo-boo and let the matter drop.

He seemed much more relaxed.

I was a basket case.

I went upstairs and took some time to talk to God about my concerns—the regret of what I’d put our family through and the fear of wasting precious time together by just hanging out. When I opened my Bible, my eyes fell on the unusual and incredibly appropriate verse I started this post with. 

I’d always read that verse with a financial application. That day I saw a different one.

So how did the night together turn out? Wonderful, of course. We ordered pizza, then instead of something scripted, our boys began sharing stories and memories from their growing up years. We laughed until we cried. And I watched as my sons renewed their relationships with each other and with us. 

I still fight my compulsive urge to over-plan, but when I see the tendency take hold, I always remember that special night when I learned the joy of wasting time.    

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