The military life can ask a lot from families–and extended families. It’s usually when life gets hardest that we hear the most incredibly thoughtless things.
In today’s post, I want to share the answers we wish we could give when we’re battling the clichés of military life.
What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.
(Seriously? My son is fighting in a war, and you think this is appropriate?)
- At least part of your family is home.
(Yeah, right. Worry works on percentages. The more family members present, the fewer worries we have.)
- You should be thankful your soldier gets a regular paycheck in this economy.
(Of course, everyone aspires to live at the income our government designates as the poverty level. Especially when that paycheck comes with a job description that could cost his life.)
- At least you won’t have to pay for your son’s college.
(My son is in the middle of a war zone, and you think I care about whether or not I’ll have to pay for college?
- Absence makes the heart grow fonder.
(At this rate, I really don’t know how I can take much more fondness.)
- I would never let my son or daughter enlist.
(Well in the first place, it wasn’t my decision. In the second, I couldn’t be more proud of his decision to serve.)
- I bet you love all the war coverage available on TV now days.
(It would be great, if any of it were believable.)
- Worry and fear are a choice, just decide not to dwell on the what-ifs.
(Yeah, I hadn’t thought of that. Thanks for the advice.)
- At least he’s not on the front line.
(That’s because this conflict has no front line. Everyone over there is in danger.)
- It must be nice to get free medical care.
(Free? The price of this medical care is higher than you could imagine.)
- Isn’t it odd how it seems like more soldiers are killed within just a few weeks of coming home?
(Oh, gee, thanks for bringing that up.)
- It could be worse, you could be a real single mother.
(I heard this said to a friend of mine. After the helpful soul who made this pronouncement left, she turned to me and said, “My husband is gone for a year, most of that time I won’t even have a reliable way to contact him. I don’t know how I could be more of a single mother!”
- You must be so disappointed your son (or husband, wife, daughter, etc) decided to enlist.
(Are you kidding? I’m button-busting proud that my son chose this.)
Beyond these, there are hundreds of other thoughtless comments people can make. I’d love to know what you’d add to the list.
