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No Boyfriend on Valentine’s Day

How to teach your teen daughter that it's okay, even fun, to be single.

A happy singleton on Valentine's Day. Photo from 123RF(r).

His name was Marco and I admit it, I lied. I was in sixth grade and all of my girlfriends had boyfriends, but I didn’t.

No guys liked me because I was skinny, shy and late to bloom. Valentine’s Day was approaching, and I was determined to have a boyfriend. So, I created, Marco. 

And since my family had two homes in two different states, it was easy to tell my friends in the one state about my new boyfriend in the other. I don’t remember how Marco and I broke up. We only lasted one weekend, and I probably told my friends that I broke his heart.

A happy singleton on Valentine's Day. Photo from 123RF(r).Like me when I was younger, today’s teen girls still have the desire to belong, and most long to have a boyfriend. Some believe anyone is better than no one. Do you have a daughter who feels lonely or sad because guys are more interested in her friends?

1.  Encourage her to get involved with different groups, sports, youth groups or school clubs. This will increase her circle of friends, and it will help her realize she isn’t alone.

Limiting herself to only a few friends who always have boyfriends sometimes causes more pressure to fit in. Branching out will also teach her that it’s okay, and even fun, to be single.

2.  If she is shy and is socially unsure of herself, encourage her to accept invitations. Not only will this help her self-confidence, but she’ll also have the opportunity to meet new friends.

3.  Let her know that she will not remain boyfriend-less forever. Instead of creating a make-believe boyfriend to fit in, encourage her self-confidence and compliment her.

When the right time comes around to choose a boyfriend, she’ll choose quality over needing to be with someone just to be with someone.

"Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." (Isaiah 41:10)

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