I’ve performed many weddings for couples in love, each one lovely and unique. Many have featured a “unity ceremony,” in which flames from separate tapers (representing the bride and the groom) are united to light a single candle that signifies their beautiful mystical unity from that day forward.
However, several couples that I’ve joined in matrimony have eschewed the candles for a different unity ceremony. The first was an outdoor event. The possibility of winds made the traditional candle service a bit tricky. So, we settled on a beautiful alternative.
Not Easily Broken
The Bible says, “A cord with three strands is not easily broken” (Ecclesiastes 4:12 NCB). Another Bible version phrases it as a “triple-braided cord is not easily broken” (NLT). So, we suspended three long colored ropes from a tall, freestanding shepherd’s crook. It stood to one side throughout the ceremony.
At the proper time, as officiant, I explained that a soloist would sing, and as she did, the bride and groom would step to the shepherd’s crook and braid together in a threefold union a blue strand that represented the groom’s life, a rose strand representing the bride’s life, and a white strand representing the Lord Jesus Christ, whom they both loved and served, thus providing a visual reminder of the spiritual reality that was taking place in that wedding ceremony.
They worked together, at first smiling and laughing at their clumsy initial efforts, then shedding tears as their symbolic action became a prayer of hope, love, and joy.
After the ceremony, they kept the braid and incorporated it into an artful design in their first home together. I hope they still have it; I know their marriage still reflects it.
A Nightly Ritual
That unity ceremony suggests a one-word prayer that I think newlyweds can adopt as a nightly ritual. Some couples feel awkward praying together as newlyweds, especially when one or both feel inadequate or self-conscious in prayer. But one word, spoken in unison, perhaps, can say and do so much.
Let me recommend it to you: “Braid.” Or, if you prefer, “weave.”
The word invokes and evokes the action. Two people who breathe that single syllable together, picturing the strands—husband, wife, Lord—are asking for their hearts, minds, souls, and bodies to be united and strong in the face of whatever challenges may come their way.
If you’re engaged or newly married, give it a try. If you know a newlywed couple, recommend it to them. And even if you’re already married, even for a long time, you might try adopting that word as a nightly prayer together.
